Love Nangie is my website built in memory of my mum - who was called Angie until she became a Grandma - then she was known as Nangie
Things my mum taught me;
🌸to be kind and help other people
Nangie was a nurse all her adult life (since 16) and even got a Degree in her 40s!
She was so proud of herself - “pleased as punch”.
This led to her becoming the Sister at West Moors District Practice. She adored her team, and was very patient and kind with her patients.
This is how ✨Sparkly People™️ began, seeing the desperate need, of too many children, and adults, to hear a different view about their chaotic mind, a positive view - one that allows not only acceptance, but celebration.
From late night bike rides with the Welch’s, ice cream/cake for breakfast to belly flopping on my birthing ball in the hospital to catapult off doing a flip mid air.
Yes I was hours away from giving birth.
Yes she was terminally ill with cancer
Yes it looked fun
Her favourite saying was “The World is our Oyster”.
Still don’t really understand what it means and have no intention of finding out - I do not like Oysters. But knew what she meant - we were free to do whatever we wanted, anything that felt right. Trust your bones.
🌸Nature is magical and should be protected
My mum killed every plant and most pets we had. Not with any intention. She genuinely did try really hard not to. She loved being outside and always commented on the patchwork colours of the rolling fields on the way to visit my dad’s family in Wiltshire.
Dead pets include sat on budgee, hoovered up budgie, carnivorous frogs (that’s not really mum’s fault), Tufty my ginger Guinea Pig - he could gallop the 15 metres from my back door up to his hutch, climbing the metal wire to get in - I trained him😊.
Tufty was shaken to death at a family BBQ by Candy, Grandma Simms’ s much loved white haired Jack Russel - also not mum’s fault.
But she did kill all our plants/dad’s roses
Now I buy her trees/flowers/plants/even a chicken🐔 …every birthday or Mother’s Day - but I look after them for her. I think she would like that.
🌸Laughing is medicine
Laugh or cry.
My mum chose laugh, she always chose laugh.
And she always had more reasons, than most, to cry.
The evening of her sombre diagnosis - 3 months to live. I did not know that, she told me “max five years”, and a rather factually expressed “this is so unfair”. She nearly survived five years - a combination of spectacular positivity from her, perseverance from my beloved dad - who would take her on 7 miles runs after chemo😳, and my breast milk which she put all over her museli, whilst making sick gagging sounds.
The miracle was most definitely the breast milk. I think.
🌸Friends are your family
My dad was away with work a lot whilst I was growing up, so mum had found the loveliest of friends.
I learned a lot about friendship from my mum, she had lots of friends.
It was not uncommon to hear laughter and giggles coming from the other room, then I’d see the tissues.
She was a good friend and I know mutual support and love was given until the end. The amount of visitors she had in the final days, really was quite marvellous.
🌸Talk to everyone
My husband still finds the story where mum said “Thank you Christine. have a lovely day” at the checkout amusing.
After a non verbal, questionable look, mum mouths whilst finger circling the position on her left shoulder - “name badge”. She is probably the reason I make friends with strangers all the time - old ladies on the bus using their free pass to sit next to a heater and see all the pretty Christmas lights on the route.
Or anywhere really, I like people.
🌸Only YOU decide who YOU are
Throughout life you will have people telling you who you are, what you want, what you are capable of, how strong you are - even WHY you do things. They will tell you things you are allowed to do, and things you are not allowed to do.
I would watch whilst mum had people telling her what SHE was thinking, or what SHE was doing and why. She was always very polite and smiled. The smile I have not quite mastered. She had more tolerance than me.
🌸”Silly rules”
I was horrified when my mum just called “Miss Denise”, “Denise”. - “She’s not my teacher”, or when she called me to come off stage 5 minutes early, during another show rehearsal. She had to collect my brother from a football match several miles away and was going to be late.
My Grandma Simms was the same. Whilst reading her the menu for her next day hospital food; “Which one do you want? fruit, jelly, ice cream, apple pie, cheesecake”
“Yes”
“You want all of them?”
She nodded.
I am not feral.
Brought up, not dragged up.
But when you ask politely why a rule is in place and the only answer is “Just the way we’ve always done it'“, my logical brain really struggles to invest into it.
If there is a logical rule, however - I will fight to protect and uphold it with all my might, or until someone else tells me and explains to me why it is a silly rule, if I agree, I change my mind.
Fickle Miss Ficklely.
That is my right as a Human, to have strong opinions, to grow, to learn and to change your mind - all in the space of 3.5 minutes.
